Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Insomniac

If I were to tell you that I do my best work in bed...I would be telling you the truth. I am an insomniac. And while millions of other people are quietly sleeping, I am usually working on some project that I cant get out of my head.

Insomnia is a real drag. You're tired all of the time and when you do sleep it is always restless. Basically, I have to go to the point of exhaustion and then, maybe then, I'll pass out.

The ladies arent so keen on insomnia which, more than likely, killed a couple of relationships I've had. Women like to sleep next to someone. And there I am...arms around a girl at 4AM. She's snoring a bit much for me and I'm sneaking through the late night channels with my free hand on the remote. "Shhh...no baby that wasnt real gunfire. I'm watching Dirty Harry."

Actually. Insomnia is pretty awful. And I've suffered from it for about 16 years. Sure, I've taken sleeping pills. But they dont actually help all that much. I just wind up a lot more tired than I would have been.

It's easy to be an Insomniac I think. There is just soooo much to do right? And my mind is always giving me crap about what I STILL need to do...sometime around 3AM.

My 3AM Mind runs something like this...

'Are you going to call that girl?...Was that a truck outside?...God. Remember that talk we had a while back?...Maybe the people in the truck are coming to get me...She seemed into me at the bar but she was wasted...Was that even the same girl?...Whoa, footsteps from the truck. This could be the hit squad!...Gee, the Universe is really big. Pretty dark though. Fish are weird...I shouldnt have broken up with the last girl...Oh wait, yeah I should...Silence. I bet the Commandos are on my roof now...How long is the flight to Paris?...God, not another restaurant. I need beach time!...Alien Resurrection is on HBO again. Gads...Hey! It's the ShamWow guy!

Suffice to say that Insomnia is NOT your friend, unless of course you want to Get Rich Quick! And then you'll be awake after midnight to watch all the infomercials to find out how.

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