Sunday, August 31, 2008

Buy ME a Drink!

Brace yourselves! I'm about to tell you how it is! I'm sure to be stepping on some painted toes here and ruffling some updos. But still, it just has to be said...

Women have forgotten how to flirt.

What!!? What did he just say!??

Back off!! You heard me. And I mean it.

I don't really know what happened. I'm uncertain as to the cause of the problem. Perhaps women have been reading too many women's magazines...or sneaking peeks into the men's magazines (I know you do ladies! So Busted!). Maybe Oprah had something to do with it since she is remaking the world in her image. It could have something to do with the way girls are being raised today in this generation. And then there's Grey's Anatomy.

Or maybe, women are just buying too much into their new feminine mystique. Perhaps, men have objectified women so much that they have internalized it and that's that.

Whatever the cause may be, the effect is that women are simply terrible flirts these days. Some guy had to say it. I just have the balls to.

If you girls are counting on your basic hotness to meet guys then you're crazy. Believe me, half of the time that is working against you. The better looking a girl is, the less men will approach her for a number of reasons. Sure, some men lack the confidence to approach a ten. Often enough, those that just rush up are either drunk or players. Good catches would like to get an idea of your personality. And your personality is the last thing guys are thinking of when you're in your little black dress.

What is required is communication. And that's what most single women suck at. Lots of girls, beautiful or not, are shy. Go girls! I love and adore shy girls. Still, it makes it hard for them. A lot of times they just partner up with loud and obnoxious girlfriends that only get in their way of happiness. Other times, they make snap judgments of suitors and just come across as hapless bitches. Its a trainwreck either way.

Girls that aren't so shy are the ones that really need to be careful. If a girl comes on too strong then it's a turnoff. Believe me, guys pass up on easy women all of the time. Girls shouldnt kid themselves. Whatever the myth they have think about a lot of other stuff than reckless sex. Maybe the average teenage boy will do anything for sex. But when a guy gets older, he's thinking about the consequences of what comes after and whether he even wants to see that girl again.

So how do most girls approach guys? Well, too many girls these days are 'working' guys for drinks at the local bar. It's really stupid. Because it will only turn off the right kind of guys.

When I meet a girl and she 'works' me for a drink I can't help but make the association that she's 'working' it. Listen to me girls. There are girls that do that for a living and most guys have dropped a dollar or two on them. So cut that crap out!

If I want to buy you a drink then I'll ask you. And if you want to meet me over drinks then buy ME the damn drink! It's actually a very nice approach from a girl precisely because so many women today are 'working' guys.

Doesnt anybody watch Disney anymore? Disney always told people do 'be yourself!' When I go out and I meet single women, so many of them are putting on a show.

'One night only! Stephanie from hospital records will be playing the role of Steph the ice queen in the red miniskirt. She will not be signing autographs after the show!'

Seriously. It's that bad.

I really dont think that it is the fault of the women. I really dont and I'm not saying that now to get off the hook with any women that I might be pissing off right now. No. I'm a feminist and I think it's our fault, men's fault, that women have resorted to these kinds of tactics. After all, women and men arent really so different. They both want to feel wanted and to have sex and to find true love.

Girls putting on the 'Girl Show' are transparent. Guys see through that. At least the sharp ones do. And arent those the guys that the women want anyway? A girl just being herself and being real with people she meets is very attractive.

I dont personally believe in "bitches." If a girl is mean to me and I dont deserve it then I know it has something to do with her being insecure. It's a weakness. Secure people dont have to bring people down to build themselves up. I remember once when one of the 'Real' girls, the secure 'be yourself' kind of girl, politely rejected me. She was very nice. She just wasnt interested in me.

Well. Crap. But, what could I do? At least she was honest! And for that I immediately liked her even more.

Don't worry girls. I'll give us guys some crap too. Face it, we men have had more time controlling the planet than you girls have. And all we did was screw it up and piss off the other half of team humanity. I'd like it if you girls would take over the world. Just be nice. Sure! Take over the world. But two wrongs dont make a right. Just because we men blew it doesnt mean you have to. Don't resort to being like the worst of men to get even with men.

So girls, get your flirt back. Put on that little black dress and come buy me a drink when you see me out somewhere. Hell, I'll buy you one too. Then sushi. Then a rose...a diamond...a house...and a college education for your kids.

That's better than a drink...I think.


Kat said...

Oh Scottie, if only there were more men like you in the world. You stop by Bently's Tuesday or Wednesday night this week and I'll buy you a drink just for being you. No pick-up expected.

Dhargaul said...

Hmmm..... and Wow, and holy shit... and damn we just may be busted.

I so remember walking into a beer bar one night long ago. Stopped just past the door to take in the crowd and see who was prowling about. I nodded to friends and aquaintances and then I saw her. She looked, I looked back and grinned. She smiled in return, so I looked at the empty seat next to her and nodded. She smiled bigger so I went to the bar, bought two drinks and sat down.

The eyes did it all, they caught me, pleased me and told me to come on over. The rest is history so to say.

It's hard to believe girls have forgotten how to flirt. I flirt all the time, and to a degree what you are saying makes total sense given how many women walk away from a small flirtation looking perturbed. A smile and a wink a the right time and they go "eh?"

LOL.... Back then the girls I knew and I would flirt for weeks sometimes before anything happened and it was fun. It made time go by and everyone laughed and smiled about things that didn't have to do with idiots passing out on the dance floor or bouncers doing what they do best. The whole world would go away and there we would be. Silliness I guess but hey, there's something to be said for that.

Flirting was the one thing that often saved me from my compulsive foot in the mouth moments. The girls that flirted back and had fun with got drinks all night if they wanted. Those that didn't never seemed to stick around for very long.

I have no answers or enlightment on this one other than it's all just a game to be played until the playing field changes. Then it's something entirely different. To bad Sun Tzu doesn't work as well here as it does in all other areas of life. :D

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